In Southeast Asia, the person paying for ageing is often not the person ageing
Across Southeast Asia in 2026, a large share of spending on older people’s medicines, nutrition and care is paid for by their adult children, often in their late thirties and forties, and sometimes from another country. Pension coverage remains thin in Indonesia, Vietnam and the Philippines, so family transfers and remittances, not retirement income, fund much of the silver economy.
For brands, that means the silver consumer is rarely one person. It is a pair: a parent who uses the product and an adult child who pays for it, researches it and worries about it. Getting that relationship right is one of the biggest commercial opportunities in the region’s ageing markets.
The evidence: a generation carrying two households
- Across the region: our Silver Economy Strategic Briefing (October 2026) finds that support from adult children and remittances outweighs pension income for most older people outside Singapore and urban Malaysia.
- Indonesia: 62% of Indonesians have family caregiving responsibilities, compared with an Asian average of 52%, and 68% have financial responsibilities towards family. People aged 35 to 44 are the most affected. (Manulife Asia Care Survey, July 2026)
- Indonesian women: 96% expect to support their elderly parents now or in future, but only 26% have set aside at least 10% of their income for it, and 57% have delayed or skipped their own medical care to support children or parents. (Sun Life study via Marketing-Interactive, April 2026)
- The Philippines: cash remittances from Filipinos overseas reached a record US$35.63 billion in 2025, equal to 7.3% of GDP. Much of it pays for parents’ medicines, clinic visits and daily needs. (Daily Tribune, citing BSP data, February 2026)
The cultural engine: filial duty, in six languages
This is not only an economic arrangement. It is a moral one. Every Southeast Asian market has its own vocabulary for the duty children owe their parents:
- Indonesia and Malaysia: berbakti kepada orang tua, devotion and respecting/honouring parents (also reinforced by religious teachings).
- The Philippines: utang na loob, a debt of gratitude that can never be fully repaid.
- Thailand: katanyu (กตัญญู), gratitude to parents shown through care and support.
- Vietnam: hiếu thảo, filial piety rooted in Confucian tradition.
- Chinese communities in Singapore and Malaysia have roots in honouring their elders, a form of 孝敬, filial piety, stemming from Confucius' teachings
The shared rule is that caring for parents is an obligation, and outsourcing it can look like neglect. That has direct commercial consequences. Nursing homes carry stigma, home-delivered care is preferred, and products have to help the family fulfil its duty rather than replace it.
Four behavioural science lenses on the adult-child buyer
- 1. Present bias: good intentions, last-minute money - Most families do not budget for their parents in advance. Behavioural economists call this present bias: people put today’s needs ahead of future ones, even when they fully intend to plan. In Indonesia, 96% of women expect to support their parents, yet only 26% have set aside at least 10% of their income for it. So spending on parents tends to happen in response to a need, a phone call or a payday, rather than a plan. That is exactly why subscriptions, auto-refills and small, regular payments work: they do the planning that families do not.
- Regret aversion: buying peace of mind - People will pay to avoid the feeling of “I should have done more”. For an adult child living in another city or country, a fall, a missed medicine or a hospital visit they did not know about is the outcome they fear most. They are not only buying a product. They are buying reassurance that nothing bad will happen on their watch.
- Visibility: care that can be seen - Filial duty is partly social. Care that is visible to the parent, to siblings and to the wider family counts for more. Products that send a delivery confirmation, a photo from the carer, a simple health report or a WhatsApp update turn an invisible purchase into proof of being a good son or daughter.
- Autonomy: the parent does not want to be a burden - Here is the tension. The same Manulife survey found that 65% of Indonesians define freedom in later life as not being a burden to others, and only about one-third expect financial support from their own children in retirement (Manulife, July 2026). Older people value dignity and self-reliance. A product that makes them feel dependent, monitored or old will be quietly resisted, even if the child has paid for it.
Designing for two customers
The winning proposition serves both people at once, with different jobs for each:
- The adult child (the payer) wants: safety, proof that care is happening, credentials and trust, convenience from a distance, and an easy way to pay on their own schedule.
- The parent (the user) wants: comfort, dignity, ease of use, a sense of independence, and nothing that looks or feels medical.
Our briefing calls this invisible support: rigorous reassurance for the buyer, without projecting frailty onto the user.
The power shifts as parents age
One important nuance: the adult child is not always in charge. Our strategic briefing shows that older people decide and pay for themselves for as long as they can. Adult children influence earlier purchases, then co-decide and pay more as health declines.
• Yolds ('young olds', 60 to 74 years): the parent decides; the child advises, gifts and sometimes tops up.
• Old-old (75 to 84 years): decisions are shared; the child increasingly pays for health and care.
• Frail (85 years and over): the child (or occasionally a facility) decides and pays.
Brands need to know which stage they are selling into, and build a journey that can hand the relationship from parent to child gracefully, without the parent feeling that control has been taken away.
What this means for brands in Southeast Asia
- Name the payer in your strategy. For nutrition, medicines, home care and insurance, define the adult child as a primary target, with their own media, messaging and research.
- Sell on the payday rhythm. Subscriptions, auto-refills and payments timed to salary or remittance days turn good intentions into regular support, without families having to plan ahead. In the Philippines, this means building on remittance channels so a child abroad can pay and the parent receives at home.
- Make care visible. Build in confirmations, updates and simple reports for the payer. It reduces anxiety and supports repeat purchase.
- Protect the parent’s face. Frame purchases as a gift, a treat or a shared plan, not as help for someone who cannot cope. Keep packaging, devices and language free of medical, frail codes.
- Plan for the handover. Design accounts, consent and communication so the relationship can move from parent-led to child-led as needs change.
- Watch the next generation. Today’s 35 to 44-year-olds say they do not want to depend on their own children. As independence becomes the new legacy, the next wave of Yolds will buy more for themselves, which favours brands that build trust with them now.
Where Illuminate Asia fits in
Illuminate Asia helps brands understand both sides of the silver purchase across Southeast Asia. Our Silver Economy Strategic Briefing (October 2026) maps who decides, who pays and where the money lands in six markets. Our teams across the region combine consumer insight, cultural intelligence and behavioural science to help you:
- Map the decision journey between parents and adult children in your category.
- Develop propositions and messaging that reassure the payer and respect the user.
- Test pricing, subscription and payment models against real family budgets in each market.
To request the briefing or discuss a project, contact us at info@illuminateasia.com.
FAQs
- Who pays for elderly care in Southeast Asia? Outside Singapore and urban Malaysia, much of it is paid by adult children and by remittances from family working abroad. Formal pension coverage remains thin, especially in Indonesia, Vietnam and the Philippines.
- What is the dual-customer model in the silver economy? It describes products bought by one person and used by another. In Southeast Asia’s silver market, the adult child often pays and researches, while the older parent uses the product. Successful brands design for both.
- What is the sandwich generation? It refers to adults supporting both their children and their ageing parents. A 2026 Manulife survey found 62% of Indonesians have family caregiving responsibilities, with people aged 35 to 44 most affected.
- How does filial piety affect consumer behaviour in Asia? Filial piety makes caring for parents a moral duty. It favours home-delivered care over institutions, makes spending on parents resilient and recurring, and rewards products that help children visibly fulfil that duty.
- How should brands market to adult children buying for parents? Offer reassurance and visibility to the payer, dignity and ease of use to the parent, and payment options that match salary or remittance cycles, such as subscriptions and auto-refills.
References:
- Illuminate Asia, Ageing Gracefully: The Southeast Asia Silver Economy Strategic Briefing, October 2026.
- Manulife Asia Care Survey 2026, Indonesia press release (July 2026)
- Marketing-Interactive: Indonesia’s sandwich generation strain deepens, Sun Life study (April 2026)
- Daily Tribune: OFW remittances hit record in 2025 (February 2026)